And then I feel better.
Today I went to the gym. It was my first time going to the gym, any gym, in a very long time. So, up out of bed, into some sweats, and down Tsverskaya Yamskaya Ultisa I went, on the way to the Mariott Grand Hotel. The trek was necessary: last night we celebrated Brendan's return to the States after the triumphant world premiere of his/our class's production of Alice vs. Wonderland.
To celebrate, we went to this bar near to our dorm. In the basment of a building, a leather-clad DJ spun pop re-mixes from the States as we Americans quadrupled the number of people in the joint. I don't think we were obnoxious, in fact, I think we were appreciated. "Billie Jean" and "Sweet Dreams" received a unique appreciation with us in the smoky room, singing at the top of our lungs along with the Russians. It was a great mix.
Tanya, one of the "Angels" from MXT (production students who are assigned to accompany us to plays and who sometimes come out with us for drinks) brought some of her friends along and helped negotiate bar orders and introductions between us and the Russians. I bought her Martini Bianca (which is nothing but vermouth) and she teased me about my vodka soda.
"Why with water?" she asked. "I like it -- you can sip it. We drink cocktails in the States." "We do here too, but with juice. Water? That's werid." I like being teased, so we laughed, clinked glasses, and joined in the dancing to P!NK's "So What." Small cultural distinctions aside, it was like being in any bar on the Lower East Side of Manhattan.
I loved it.
We then tumbled back to the dorm -- being sure to get in by 1am (or else we're locked out until 6am) -- and continued the party there. Erikka, one of the actresses, and I got some stuff for the celebration (caviar flavord Lays potato chips) and barely made it back in time. After some more hijinks on the third floor, I very happily said "hello" to my bed and slept like a log.
And then I went to the gym. It was a good work out, and I got to watch RT - the Russian news channel that broadcasts in English. It's amazing how similar our cultures are, even though they're different. The Russian news focus, the in depth reporting, even the graphics were all like stuff you find at home on BBC or CNN.
And then the special report on secret CIA prisons in Lithuania and Poland and throughout Europe. It was demonizing of the USA. The opening images of the program had nothing to do with secret European CIA prisions -- they were videos of the notorious prisons in Guantanamo and Abu Ghrab. Then came the decidedly sharp news coverage; it was sickening.
And then I remembered I was in Moscow.
As I negotiated the elliptical treadmill in the palacial Grand Hotel on Tsverskaya, my second reaction to the report (after my initial reaction of horror) was "Of course we did this -- there was a Cold War. Of course we're continuing to do this -- Russia toys with Europe's gas supply in the Winter and is bellicose in other ways. Of course we're contintuing to do this -- Iran is now a nuclear nation." It doesn't forgive our actions, but it justifies them. And while I can't say I'm proud of the actions, one look at the hammer & sickle on the Telegraf building, or the busts of Lenin that adorn almost every Moscow street, or the Stalinist glorification of military might and Russian olympianism, reminds me that the world is complicated. The rationale employed to negotiate this complication isn't always clear or clean.
As I left the gym, I was again thinking about the night out with Brendan (my head was still a little sore). I wondered what the Russians at the bar really thought of us Americans -- were we like the images they see on TV, or were we something else.
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