"In Memory of TinAlane DeGrazia" is the name of the photo album. The picture is of me, Jessie, Mary, Rob, Mike, Kelly, Tina, Bridget. The whole mess of us were camping: the annual Drama Department canoeing trip to Quetico Park in Canada. With our eight high school aged faces looking out at me, the "In Memory of TinAlane DeGrazia" threw me into a panic -- why the "In Memory?"
A frenzy of Google searching, clicking through Facebook pages, and my misty eyes came across a note on Jessie's Facebook page. It was from Rachel: Tina had been battling liver disease for a couple of years (I don't think many people knew). She died a few days ago (the 16th or 17th). There will be a memorial a couple of days after Easter - in Park Ridge, Illinois.
I will be in Moscow. The mist in my eyes grew quite thick, my head dizzy.
Tina and I weren't terribly close since we graduated from high school. In fact, the first time I saw her was after she graduated and was at Knox College in Galesburg, Illinois. She was a bit of bitch to me -- that "I'm in college now, I'm an adult" kinda' bitchyness. My high school heart was disappointed; I drifted away from Tina. It was only through Facebook that Tina and I were able to reconnect -- about 2 years ago -- and we wrote each other, every once in a blue moon, and would mention getting together over some holiday at home.
I don't get back to Illinois for very long periods of time, but this past summer, as I prepped for my college move, I had enough days to meet up with high school friends. Tina was not among them - I wish she was, but she had moved to Texas. It was a fun lunch, catching up with folks, meeting husbands and babies, but Tina wasn't there. I hoped she might, by some miracle, be there so we could spend more time together like we did in high school.
I was Tina's Senior Prom Date. She wore an ivory pantsuit, I wore a tail coat with an ivory tie and vest. As a Junior, honored to escort a Senior to her prom, I remember thinking how serious Senior Prom was. Was this the first step to a serious relationship?? Did my mom, or Tina's mom, expect me to propose marriage?
Looking back, I highly doubt either mother expected me to get down on one knee. In fact, I sincerely doubt if Tina expected me to get down on one knee, but I don't think that mattered to her. What mattered was having fun, and we did -- driving to prom in a pick-up, spending post-prom at the luxurious Illinois Athletic Center, and then spending the weekend at the Anichini's summer cottage in Wisconsin with what seemed like every Senior who had ever stepped onto the Maine South High School stage.
Tina. She would sit in Sanch's office, the tech director's tiny office next to PA 101 in the performing arts wing of my high school, and swivel around in his chair pointing her toes. She was a Hawkette, a swimmer, a drama freak. She loved dancing -- its form and grace -- and loved to pirouette and prance around the PA wing. She would sigh out "Alane!" in a dreamy voice. She was a melo-dramatic high school girl, without the drama. She and Tim Osborne were on-again, off-again, boyfriend/girlfriend -- but it was always amicable and never too fussy (as I experienced it). She was a techie, working backstage building sets, but would also audition and win roles in various productions, but I never saw her sport an ego. She sang alto in the choir, but I don't think she fussed over never getting a solo.
My Freshman year, she gave a presentation on Hello, Dolly! in Drama I, and because of that she and I perfected our Carol Channing impersonations -- mimicing a clip of Carol being interviewed by Conan O'Brien. We cut school together, with Kathy Sandrik, on "Southfest" my Sophomore year. We were friends, she more my protector - defending me from the taunts of other boys (either to my face or behind my back).
Tina DeGrazia. There were so many friends in high school, but few have places in my memory -- let alone my heart.
"Us"
"Tina"
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